Sometimes I forget I have cancer….. sometimes.

Sometimes I forget I have cancer….. sometimes.

February 24, 2017. Friday. Thursday was a rough day, today was better. I woke up feeling much better, like I had oxygen running through my body. It was dress down day at work. I like wearing work clothes, I feel good in them, professional, knowledgable and powerful. However, wearing jeans on Friday’s does feel good. I stopped at Dunkin’ Donuts for a small iced french vanilla coffee with cream and a sausage, egg and cheese on an english muffin. The end of the month is always busy at work. I felt good all day. I had a lot of things on my list and I accomplished all of them. It was a beautiful day. It is crazy how a nice day just changes livesssss.

I got home and there was a package outside. It was from a familiar name. I went into my bed and opened it. There were two cards; one from my childhood friend and one from her mom. The tears began. There was also a dove and a bracelet with “she beleieved she could, so she did” engraved on it. I took a minute, sat back, and got into a little bit of a heavy cry, because WOWWWWWWWW, PEOPLE ARE AMAZINGGGGGGGGG. Their letters were long and heartfelt both with FUCK CANCER at the end. It took me a while to formulate messages to both of them because I couldn’t put into words how much their words and gifts touched me. Gina & Mrs. C, thank you x a million. 

I was meeting my friend Jan for dinner. We wanted to sit outside so Havana could come, her pup. She lives less than a mile down the street from me, she walked up, casually 6 months pregnant. Jan loves a good walk. We were walking into town and Kim texted me saying “I see you”, lol. He was just getting home when we were walking into town. There were no restaurants with outdoor seating! I suspected that the temperature was going to drop and be really cold but it really wasn’t and I feel like that was what the restaurants thought too. We walked a bit farther down and there are two restaurants that always have seats outside, even in the snow, so we knew we would have a chance there. Cha ching, italian. We sat down and it felt great. I got a trio sampler; rice ball, eggplant rollatini and meatball. It was delicious. I love a good rice ball. By the end of dinner I was sleeeeeepy. Lots of steps, the most I have documented on my watch so far, over 6,500. It is really hard to get to 10,000 steps, sigh. Goals. 

I got home and Kim was sprawled out on the couch. I was tired and awake and tired at the same time. My brain was awake but my body was tired or was my body tired and my brain was awake. Kim wanted to watch a movie. Always takes forever to find one. He picked Hacksaw Ridge. It looked really good in the preview. I was in it for the popcorn. Wait, Kim went to make popcorn and then he didn’t come back for 15 minutes and I finally realized, “ummmm Kim, what are you doing” … “None of these bags are popping! Did you know they expire??”. Only one of four bags popped!! Don’t worry, we still ate it. It was like five days expired. We brought it up to dad later and he said there is water involved in the process and over time it will evaporate and not work properly. Ugh yea, he’s so smart it’s annoying. Anyway, I lasted about ten minutes into the movie and it was time to get in bed. I mean, I think it might have been past 10 pm at this point. Sleeps.

February 25, 2017. Saturday. Kim and I had to leave the house by 8:30 am to get to our knife skills cutting course. Yup. Kim’s idea. YUP. I found this class online at a cooking studio/house. Looked pretty cool and I was into it. We stopped along the way to get water and a little breakfast action; pop tarts. I got strawberry, he got smore’s. But do you remember how good those are? Damn. I mean, pure sugar, they better be good. We got to the class at 9 am on the dot, second to last people. There were mostly couples, a few individual people. It was a decent class. Learned a few things, chopping skills, OH AND I TOOK APART A CHICKEN. Wow, weird, wow, weird, wow, weird. Really cool to know how to do that.

We got out of the class around 11:30 am and after not eating anything but one pop tart all day, you will crave McDonald’s. Damnitttttttt. We were on our way to Trader Joe’s and definitely could not go there on an empty stomach. Kim wanted a sub from a deli. All of this in the area of TJ’s. This is what happened: I dropped Kim off at the deli, went to the McDonald’s drive-thru, got a (double) cheeseburger with small fries and small coke (SMALL OK), drove back to the deli, parked and we ate in the car, with minimal words. LOL! WAIT THIS IS REAL LIFE GUYS. We were both tired and starving. I was not 1% full after eating it either, and it was goooood.

We were going out to dinner with Kim’s mom, dad and my dad that night. We planned on going to a restaurant in town but I called while noshing on my burger and they had no openings. Then I called another place, nothing, another, nothing, another, nothing, another, nothing, another, nothing, another, nothing. No, legit this many. After even going outside of Morristown, I gave up and we decided on a local restaurant/bar we knew would not be packed. We got home arounddddd, maybe 1-1:30 pm. Kim was exhausted and was not feeling too well. He got on the couch and I decided to do laundry. I haven’t done laundry, the entire sha-bang, at once in months. I mean like; multiple loads, in washer, in dryer, folded and put away, all at once. Most of the time it’s, washer, dryer, leave it in the dryer, next day or two days later dry again, some stuff is wrinkly then I put it back in the dirty laundry and wash it again next time. Oh wow, all my dirty secrets really coming out. Let’s go back to how I actually accomplished something fully. So I did laundry, go me! I felt good all day. Maybe a little tired but nothing crazy. I felt really accomplished, I won’t lie.

Of course it was going to rain tonight from about 5:30-7 pm. Dad met at our house and then we met Kim’s parents at dinner. We had some apps; mango salsa, chicken quesadillas and philly cheesesteak egg rolls. No, so good. Dad and I split some asian, rice, chicken, peanut deliciousness. We got home around 9 pm and I was reallyyyyyyyy excited to try these almond croissants we got at TJ’s. Angie and I were talking about how good almond croissants were the other day and I saw some in the frozen section of TJ’s and had to try them. They are super interesting. So they are frozen, you take them out the night before, place them on buttered parchment paper …

February 26, 2017. Sunday… wake up and SEE THEY HAVE DOUBLED IN SIZE. Omg it was like Christmas morning. I did not think it would work. I’ve always had trouble getting dough to rise. Baked them for 18 minutes and they were one of the best croissants I have ever had. Gosh I love Trader Joe’s. 

I had to do 3-4 hours of work. I had my croissant with some coffee, did my work then Kim woke up. Kid needs sleep. I had scrabbled eggs and a slice of bacon then made Kim a bacon, egg and cheese on an almond croissant with the almond stuff scraped out from the inside because we did not have any bread. He said it was good. We were going to Kim’s sister for a pre-Oscar party because….. no one wanted to stay up and have an Oscar party, essentially. We were bringing an appetizer. I wasn’t sure what to make but I love making individual things. I decided to make individual 7 layer dips; refried beans, corn, homemade guac, sour cream, sriracha, cheese, salsa and olive to garnish. Yumz.

Got to Rachel’s around 5 pm. Noshed on my dip cups, then Rachel made totchos. Huh, you ask? Tator tots, homemade melted cheese, homemade salsa, chorizo, guac, CRAY! It was delicious. 

We were all extremely full so laid out on the couch before dinner. Yes there was dinner. Pat made her beef stew, mmmmm, alongside an “Italian sub” salad, all the fixings in a salad! Pretty cool. THEN WE HAD CHOCOLATE CAKE. Aye carumba. We left around 8 pm, walked in the house at 8:30 pm on the dot to watch the opening monologue of the Oscars. I was over it after that, went upstairs and was quite sleepy. Another week done. Another starts tomorrow. 

Does it even sound like I have cancer in this post? Like hot damn I’m gonna do this. 


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